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Tuesday, August 26, 2008

never had there been a time when i have felt so much panic while studying.
nor so did it ever occur to me that i will feel stress, an emotion which i do not believe in before where everything seems under control.
especially when doing familiar subjects like math.
its like a rude awakening, a unfortunate self actualisation.
i am feeling so distraught at my inability.

its like, suddenly, i have been robbed of my skill to do those questions, to be able to recall and apply. the wonder of not studying that much and yet be able to do it.

regret,

those one and a half years which i have wasted away.

its time to start living in the present.

and not drown myself i self pity, self denial.

theres no time of past glory, only time to strive for more.

gone are the confidence i have.

god, i pray for preserverance.

i can only work to the best i can for now.

discipline. i remember it now, discipline.

with the one week grace,
you know what you should be doing.
paper 3 ftw.